O tidings of comfort and toys
Duffies, we quickly learnt, excel at many things.
There is, however, nothing at which they excel more exceedingly than making themselves comfortable, even - or, indeed, especially - in what would be, to less talented creatures, the most adverse of circumstances.
Voila some of the lessons we have learnt thus far…
Lesson 1. Duffies are most adept at spotting an opportunity.
Lesson 2. Never put the bolster on the floor when changing the sheets.
Lesson 3. Do not fall for the “but look how comfy I am” look.
Lesson 4. Do not be fooled. If you wake her, she will manage to fall asleep again.
Lesson 5.
Your presence on the sofa is categorically based solely on a Duffy’s permission, which may be revoked at any opportunity, without prior notice.
Lesson 6. Said permission will be revoked regularly and doggedly. Resistance is useless…
Lesson 7. No really. Resistance really is useless. Do not even try it.
Lesson 8. Access to one’s laptop and, indeed, one’s attempts to make a living will be prohibited as appropriate. Vigorous snout-nudging (aka snudging) will be deployed as and when necessary.
Lesson 9. Do not, under any circumstances, be a toy.
Lesson 10. Do not, under any circumstances, attempt to take a Duffy’s toy.
Lesson 11. A Duffy will go to any lengths - and indeed heights - to keep control of her toys.
Lesson 12. So don’t even try to go there, right? In your heart of hearts, you know who’ll win, don’t you?
Lesson 13. Duffies always know that they will totally get away with it. Every. Single. Time.
